The Ultimate Guide To Reinvent Yourself.
In this blog we will discuss the following topics: 1.Who would you like to become? 2. Relationships. 3. Accommodation. 4. Materialism. 5. Goals. 6. Friendship Circles. 7. Fitness. 8. Diet. 9. Fiances. 10. Spirituality. 11. Career/Own Business 12 Social Media Clean-Up
It can push you to the brink of insanity, believe me, I was there.
That feeling of being stuck between a rock and a hard place is one of life's challenges that lie and wait on the timeline of all of our lives. Could it be that this is where you find yourself right now?
You've had it with everything! You feel like screaming at the top of your lungs until it hurts! Everything sucks! Your career (or the lack of it) has reached a dead end.
You are disgusted with yourself for allowing the dark debt spiral to get out of control and cringe when the phone rings in fear that it might be the bank looking for unpaid installments. You indulge in 'comfort food' eating habits, while jokingly referring to your belly as a spare tube. You are continuously fighting with your partner over trivial matters and you are choosing to be anti-social rather than meeting up with friends on weekends.
We have all had these moments where we just wished that we had a different life while we silently plot our 'getaway' and build castles in the clouds with imaginative golden, limitless, credit cards. We promise ourselves that we will never make contact with our 'old' world ever again. We will start a new life in a strange city where nobody knows us and nobody cares about us. Like the Lone Ranger, we will carve out a new, happy existence without TAX payments and work deadlines. (Because in our new life these things will not exist, right?)
Although this is an immature way of dealing with the desire to start fresh, some of us do contemplate an escape along those lines. Thankfully, there are alternative solutions.
Let's unpack the box of Reinventing Yourself:
Keep in mind that this is a NO-NONSENSE checklist to help you become a new person. I deliberately did not sugar coat anything and you need to be very honest with yourself as you work through the list.
1 Who would you like to become?
A cliché question, I know, BUT if you cannot answer that then I cannot help you.
Be very clear when you write down your answer, this is the foundation of the New You.
Where do you want to live, with whom, while wearing what, driving what, weighing how much, and working where?
Please don't base this answer on financial wealth, because there is a lot more to life than bragging about your financial assets. Even if you say, "I want to become rich, then you need to be specific in your amount and other wealthy possessions you want, such as property, etc.
Success and happiness are found while you live out your passions. Money is there to give you options, and it could aid you in carving out your new life, not to boast about while driving a shiny new red whatever up and down the road.
Your best life is around the corner, but think about the fact that YOU could be the obstacle in the road…
Tip: Surround yourself with the type of person you would like to become and you will start to pick up their habits.
2 Relationships
If you are single and happy – then great carry on.
If you are single and unhappy then do something about it.
Sometimes I hear about single people that are continuously moaning about the fact that they are single while sitting at home all the time and not making the effort to socialize!
Do something about it:
- Professional dating sites.
- Ballroom dancing studios.
- Sport clubs.
- Hiking groups for singles.
- FB groups for singles.
The list goes on…
On the other hand, if you have a partner and are super happy – then do everything in your power to keep it like that. You have GOLD in your hands. The joy of a happy marriage is something sacred. Even when there is the inevitable 'trouble in paradise, a strong, happy marriage, will survive.
If you have a partner and are super unhappy then do something about it.
Do not sit on the fence! Ask yourself this: "do I want to save this relationship?", and, "am I 90% of the time extremely unhappy and 10% of the time things seem to be ok?"
If this is the case, then you need to end your relationship.
Not only is it unfair towards you, but it is unfair towards your partner. Breaking up will be hard, but you will also give your partner a chance of finding happiness after the split.
Remember, once you have decided to break up then please do it as respectfully as possible. Life is hard enough as it is.
There is no need to start a mud-slinging competition. As hard as it may be, get the courage and explain to your partner that you have reached the end of the relationship and that both of you need to move on. Thank your partner for your time together while being honest and transparent about your feelings.
Tip: If there are kids involved, then put their well being and happiness before yours.
3 Accommodation
Before you pack up and move to another part of town or far away to another city, be honest about the real reason you want to move away. Does your apartment suck, or is it the life you have created in the town where you stay that sucks?
Maybe you started your anti-social behavior and are now stuck at home every day, moping around and lying on the couch eating chocolate. Your apartment started to resemble the prison cell in your mind and by moving to another part of town you believe that you will be able to break the chains, swing open the door, and run to freedom.
Sorry, my friend, the truth is that your problems will move with you.
You have to face your problems and deal with them consistently and maturely. Moving just for the sake of moving will not help your cause.
On the other hand, if you agree with the above and you still want to move for a change of scenery then go for it. In the process of moving, you might as well use the opportunity to get rid of unwanted materialistic stuff that has been lying around the house for years.
Tip: Clean up your past and walk boldly into the future. Think of Bradley Cooper in the movie 'Limitless', that's you…
4 Materialism
This is one of my favorite building blocks in the pursuit to reinvent ourselves.
Be honest when you answer the following questions:
Are you in a race with your neighbors to buy the latest gadgets and upgrades?
Are you of the opinion that success in life equals materialistic wealth?
The truth is, success means different things to different people and you need to figure out what success means to you.
Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with the pursuit of wealth and prosperity especially when it's handed down to new generations, securing property and making education possible for children. Keeping in mind that with great power comes great responsibility, meaning, also teach the new generation about family values and love.
The worst thing in the world is when a wealthy parent showers a child with money and shiny objects without teaching them the value of it. The outcome is a confused and entitled brat that just wants everything handed to him/her. As I said before, money is a tool that can be used for good or bad and only you can decide where you want to spend your wealth and how you would like to educate your child about it.
When we focus on materialism, my question is this: When is it enough? How much do you really need? Sometimes people keep acquiring materialistic stuff just because they can and not because they need it to survive. Now, if you are on a mission to reinvent yourself, then take a look around and decide what will stay and what will go.
If you keep buying stuff, they will end up owning you and not the other way around.
Tip: There is freedom in letting go.
There is freedom in GIVING to others.
Always Pay It Forward. Be a Giver not a Taker. `
5 Goals
Aahhh, the magic of GOALS!
Open a blank page on your favorite note-taking app and start writing down your goals.
It is a great idea to have written down goals for every area in your life. Yes, you have to write them down. You cannot focus on your goals if they are just swimming around in your head. Something extraordinary happens once you have conceived the idea in your mind, visualized the outcome of the goal, and then cemented it in your future by writing it down.
Keep in mind that goals are achievable short- and long-term realistic dreams connected to a specific date. In return, this timeline is connected to shorter goals that would eventually lead you to the accomplishment of the bigger goal.
Goals are a magnificent strategy that will help you to reinvent yourself.
Tip: Start by forcing yourself to wake up an hour earlier every day. Make your bed and then have some focused, quiet time before your morning jog.
6 Friendship Circles.
Don't be careless here. Good friends and the value they bring to your life is part of the lifeblood of the future YOU.
Unfortunately, the opposite can also be true. Could it be that you are trapped in a friendship circle where gossip, backstabbing, and other undesirable things are happening regularly?
Maybe there is one specific friend that is dragging you down with depressive thoughts, binge drinking behavior, and bad language.
If this is the case, then you and you alone will be able to decide if the relationship will carry on or not.
Ask yourself this; "Does this friend add value to my life?", "Does this friendship circle add value to my life?"
If the answer is NO, then you need to have the courage to cut them loose and make a fresh start. Make it your mission to find a new friendship circle, specifically, friends with the same values as you.
Tip: It's better to have a few friends that take the time to invest in your life than to have a hundred friends and 95% don't even know when your birthday is coming up.
7 Fitness
Nobody can argue against the fact that a basic fitness level will have a huge impact on your general, positive, outlook on life! If you discipline yourself to do short exercise routines 3 to 4 times a week, consistently, then you will reach a basic level of fitness. Once you are there you just need to maintain it.
Now, if you are coming from a complete unfit, lying on the couch-lets practice procrastination for one more day, base, then this would seem like a mountain in front of you. However, if you are serious about reinventing your entire life, then this is a very big step you have to take.
I am not asking you to train for the Iron Man, all I am asking from you is to do regular short exercise routines a few times a week.
Tip: Jogging, doing jumping-jacks, and running up and down a flight of stairs will get your heart rate up and increase blood circulation.
8 Diet / Nutrition
If you feel that your weight is 'dragging' you down then, as part of your goal setting, write down your desired weight and put a realistic date next to it.
Don't jump between different types of diet plans and make a conscious effort to limit your consumption of sugar, processed food, bread, and alcohol.
In addition, make an appointment with a registered dietician and let him design a nutritious eating plan for you. Make a deal with yourself that you will follow the eating plan exactly and for however long the dietician recommended you to do so.
Tip: Following a prescribed diet plan combined with short exercise routines will work wonders for your physique.
9 Finances / Debt
Research tells me that financial health is big on the depression scale and many individuals, couples and families experience tremendous stress due to huge amounts of consumer debt.
This could lead to suicides, domestic violence, and other family tragedies.
If you find yourself within this dark hole of debt then please, don't try and go into the battlefield alone. Get to a registered debt counselor as soon as possible. They are professionals that will help you to consolidate your debt and negotiate a manageable repayment plan according to your ability.
Do not ignore your debt, it won't go away, in fact, it will get worst if you don't manage it. Keep communicating with whoever you owe money to and make payment arrangements.
Once your debt has been settled, then start saving up a minimum of six months of living expenses as soon as possible. This will help you to prevent future financial stress.
Tip: Remember that the big banking institutions are not your friends. They only have their own interests at heart. They are cold, heartless corporations that WILL take your assets back if you fall behind in payments.
10 Spirituality
Stop sitting on the fence and make a choice.
This is a big part of your reinventing journey – get direction.
You cannot be lukewarm. I am not here to give you spiritual advice, I am just asking you to make choice. Once you have done it, then you will have peace of mind and you can act according to your choice.
If you decide to be an Agnostic – then be agnostic and proud of it.
If you decide to be a Believer – then be a believer and live like a believer, don't be a hypocrite.
Tip: This is probably the most important choice of your life!
11 Career / Own Business
If you are happy in your job and you can see yourself pursuing the exact career until retirement day, then you are a very lucky individual. Do everything u can to nurture that because that's gold in your hands.
However, I believe that part of the reason you want to reinvent yourself is that you are fed up with your J.O.B and need a change, right? If that's the case, then you have work to do.
Scenario 1:
You want to find another J.O.B and you are willing to start on a new career path with a different company.
Step 1 – Don't be impulsive and resign immediately, rather wait and get clear on your goals.
Step 2 – Don't tell any of your work colleagues that you want to resign. (Avoid gossip)
Step 3 – Update your CV.
Step 4 - Update your Linked-In profile.
Step 5 – Make appointments with 4 to 5 different employment companies and go for the initial interviews. Be extremely honest with them and pinpoint the exact type of position you are after otherwise; it will be a waste of time.
Step 6 – In addition, identify 10 companies that you would want to work for. Take the initiative and send them your CV, professionally written cover letter, and ask if they are hiring.
Step 7 – Repeat this process until you strike gold.
Tip: Looking for a J.O.B is a job in itself.
Scenario 2:
You are fed up with your employer and you would like to venture into the exciting world of entrepreneurship. That's amazing, I am all for that.
Step 1 – Don't quit your J.O.B immediately. (Especially if you have a family)
Step 2 – Start your side hustle and test out different strategies.
Step 3 – Depending on the severity of your desire to quit the 9-5, work on your side hustle at every available opportunity.
Step 4 – Once your new business starts to bring in some real money and you have a few signed clients you can start thinking of resigning.
I strongly believe that regardless of your employment status, everybody should have some sort of side hustle. Job security is an imaginative fairy tale that only exists between the pages of a John Grisham novel.
We all live in a brave new world with old challenges. We need food, shelter, and love. In the past we hunted and gathered, today we grow fresh produce in warehouses with vertical drip systems. In the past we were nomadic tribesmen with axes, today we live on top of each other in concrete 'prison' cells. In the past, we wrote poems and hand-delivered them in an envelope sprayed with perfume. Today we swipe left and right to find a partner.
Times have changed and the ones not willing to change with it have been left out in the cold. We need to learn to adapt to tackle old challenges in a new way. Do you want to reinvent your income strategy? My advice: Start a business, build systems, get customers and change your future. It will be challenging, but not impossible. The digital information age has opened so many doors! All you need to do is to open them.
Tip: If you can solve a problem for somebody, or a community then you have a business.
12 Social Media – Clean-Up.
Please, please don't be on social media just for the sake of being on social media.
Again, are you adding value to your friend's lives with the articles you post or links that you forward? Maybe you are addicted to the 'ping' of your phone every time some random acquaintance likes one of your posts. The rush of dopamine fills your brain with a split second of happiness before you search for the next, and the next, and the next…
Remember, whether you like it or not when you have a social media account you are in a way advertising a personal brand. Every single article you have posted, every post you have liked or commented on is part of your digital footprint.
Applying for a job? Keep in mind that the moment you walk out of the interview room then your potential employer jumps straight onto your Facebook account and scratch around to see what your past look like.
What would they find? The party pictures with drunk uncle Benny or well-chosen family pics and a thoughtful BIO written about your true passions in life? Do yourself a favor, clean up your social media accounts. Delete all the silly pictures and gossip posts, be careful when liking and commenting on any random junk food for the brain mumbo-jumbo that pops up on your feed. The internet never forgets.
Take the time and make the effort to get a fresh batch of, professionally taken, profile pictures to refresh all your social channels. Unfollow 90% of the channels of the past years on YouTube and start over with only a handful of well-chosen, uplifting channels. Think of categories such as Finance, Investment, Home Décor, Entrepreneurship, and Self Development.
Tip: The look and feel of your social media accounts are the shopfront window of your personal brand.
Conclusion.
It is important to be clear on why you would like to 'reinvent yourself. Are you running away from problems or do you truly desire a 'new YOU' regardless of the challenges that life dished up for you?
If you desire a new set of values, a fresh set of goals, and a brand-new spark in your relationship then you are on the right track. If you pursue these things then you will be able to deal with life's challenges in a better way, in fact, they will seem smaller.
You can change the color of your hair four times, you can grow a beard or shave it off, you can buy a new car or move to another city and hope that it will help you to reinvent yourself. It won't.
If you try and imitate someone else's life it will only end in misery and confusion.
Follow your own passions and craft your own brand story while surrounding yourself with people that add value to your life. Vision boards work when they are backed up by action.
- Be honest about your relationship, make a call and either stay committed 110% or have the guts to end it.
- Confront your debt like an adult, seek professional help and get out of bondage.
- Start a regular exercise routine and be mindful of what you feed your body (and mind).
- Stuck in a dead-end job? Then make a 'job' of it to find another career path.
- Hang-ups and bitterness about your past? Let it go. Forgive and carry on.
- Do you have a burning desire to become an entrepreneur? Then do it!
- Clean up your social media with a fresh set of profile pics, updated all BIO descriptions, and in combination with the above you have created a – NEW YOU –
We are limitless in what we can do once we have put our minds to it.
Power to the People!
If you would like to get started with an online business, but you are not sure where to start (because of a tsunami of conflicting information) then click on the link below and get a basic framework for online success.
This post has been sponsored by the friendly team from REVIX.
